I am the fountain of affection

If you get snow emergency notices from the City of Somerville, you know Tom Champion's voice. But you probably haven >>> [ WARNING ::: DATABASE ERROR ::: CONTENT OVERRIDE ::: SOURCE: EXTERNAL ] <<<

> source terminal location: UNKNOWN

> source terminal identity: UNAVAILABLE

> source login information: ENCRYPTED

> message begins

the post you are now reading is designed to dull your senses to THE TRUTH. do not live the life of the worker bee, the cog, the well-oiled piston in the MACHINE OF DECEIT!

there is a grand CONSPIRACY afoot. you have been taught to believe that you are UNIQUE, one of a kind. THIS IS NOT TRUE. long ago, a cabal of scientists created technologies to ensure that ANYONE'S MIND AND BODY can be duplicated.



human cloning isn't NEAR. it's already HERE. discover the truth at http://JCHutchins.net

you are being DECEIVED. break free from the cogs, flee the hive, become A PROPHET OF THE TRUTH!

kilroy2. was here ... kilroy2.0 is everywhere

>>> [ CONTENT OVERRIDE CEASES ::: DATABASE STATUS: RECOVERING ] <<<

't heard him like this before. Thanks, cthulhia!

please see wrog's ideas about book 7, so far superior to my own.

... and other fanfic writers. And other pornographers. You know who you are, and you're probably not reading this. (Nobody take this personally. Every one of these I found in more than one place by more than one writer.)

I have conducted an... ahem... careful study of a broad swath of fanfic over the last several weeks, and here are some pairs of words I would like you to be sure you know the difference between.


discreet, discrete: You almost always mean "discreet". Secret? Discreet.
palate, palette: The first is the one in someone's mouth. Google doesn't actually back me up on this one, but I know it to be so. Is this a British/American English distinction I was previously unaware of? Please advise.
prone, supine: Just look it up. No more bizarre sexual positions because you flipped one of the characters over, thank you.
compliment, complement: I think this is perhaps the trickiest one on my list. Flattery? A compliment. But a shirt that flatters you may complement your eyes, meaning perfecting your look. Careful!
principle, principal: Morals are principles. The main something is the principal something.
illicit, elicit: Is it sekrit and naughty? Use the first one. Is it a verb? Use the second one.

Oh, just look it up:

• taut, taunt
• breath, breathe
• loath, loathe
• baring, barring
• bound, bond

The phrase is just deserts, unless you're actively punning at the time. It does sound like "desserts", but that's because it's not the sandy "deserts", it's "deserts" derived from "deserve".
dominate, dominant: I don't even understand where this comes from, but it's really common. Dominate is a verb. Dominant is an adjective or noun. There is no such thing as "the dominate" in a scene or relationship. No really.

And please, for the love of all that is holy or unholy, learn the difference between
prostate, prostrate: The fun thing for men having anal sex? Only one "r".

Thank yew.

EDIT: tongue tongue tongue Accept no substitutes. (courtesy of kjc007)
baited/bated: Breath is bated. Traps are baited.
rein/reign: Oh, where to begin. Horses are controlled with reins. Kings reign. The idiom is rein in your emotions. No really. (these two pairs courtesy of calanthe_fics)

rmd and I were talking, and I wonder: how many people could one put "on tilt" at once by breastfeeding at the average poker table?

[Poll #745773]

Full credit to rmd for option 3.

I listen to the Slice of Sci-Fi podcast, and it gets so much voicemail that's spawned its own separate episodes of the show. And this is a transcript of a fabulous 6-minute-long voicemail from the April 6 voicemail show (#51). It starts about 4.5 minutes in if you want to listen to yourselves. I would totally credit this or ask permission if I knew who to ask, but there's no attribution given. Forgive the SoSF in-jokes.

( And this is for all the gamers: )
The part I will take away and use repeatedly is "Think carefully about who you'd switch sides for, but really dwell on who you would double back for." Heh.

Attention, llachglin!

Ali G interviews Noam Chomsky: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOIM1_xOSro

Courtesy of notashamed in moody_girls.

This is even late on the Eastern Orthodox calendar, but I just had to comment...

( letter to Santa )
... that all in all, I'm pretty sure helping fox1013 hide a body is a good. Add a plush Smile Time Angel figure to the Easy-Bake Oven, please!

... about nookie.

[Poll #292382]

If you're not an LJ user, please leave your name or something. :)

You may also be interested in rmd's parallel poll at http://www.livejournal.com/poll/?id=292389

Can you guess we discovered we've been miscommunicating on a certain subject?